Barbed Wire

My heart isn’t shattered and it’s not broken in half either

Both of those situations would be easier to handle than the reality I face.

Rather, my heart and my body have been intertwined with stitching of him.

It’s in every corner, in every layer of my body.

And I have to pull it out slowly, because what once felt like a warm blanket, now it feels like barbed wire.

What once was blossomed with love and safety and happiness, now pokes and shreds and hurts

Every inch I remove I have to pause and sew up the torn ligaments from where it once lay…. So I don’t bleed out all at once

It is the most brutal kind of removal

I’ve never experienced anything like it and I’m still not certain I will survive it

But I keep on trying